Monday, March 29, 2010

2012: Then End of Times!

Wow! I just found out we only have two years left to live. WTD?! I rented the movie 2012s: Noah's Revenge this week from the popular dvd club Netflix this week! In this movie was Joan Cusacks, Manda Peets, Samuel Glover, and a poodle. What an eye opening movie this was. Apparently the Mayas got tired of making calendars and stopped at 2012, so the world is going to crack up and turn into water in two years. Good thing I saw this movie. I've started building my own ark so I wont have to fly to China and sneak onto the ones over there! If You didn't see 2012s yet. You should call Netflix and have it sent to you so you know what to expect. I watched it with my lady friend Sandra (Who also recently won the Best Buns Competition on our spring break related trip to Cleveland.) After words I loaned the disc WMTDS food critic Darryl T. Evans so he could watch it with his girlfriend Terry and her three children Jaden (10), Lexi (6), and Tanqueray (4). After words Darryl had a Q&A to help the kids deal with what they had saw. He recorded it and am posting the transcript here for you to share with you childrens too also:

Darryl: Okay kids, that's what we got to look forward to. Ya'll got you some questions?

Lexi: Why did all those people die Mr.Darryl?

Darryl: They died because they didn't have themselves a boat, and because they was athiests.

Jaden: We don't have a boat Mr.Darryl, are we gonna die too?

Darryl: I must admit, some of us in this room is gonna die, but I'm building a boat that will hold three or four of us.

Lexi: Who gets to go on the boat?

Darryl: Well your mother and I are in for that leaves room for one of you and maybe Tanqueray if he doesn't get fat like the two of you.

Lexi: Can't you just build a bigger boat.

Darryl: Well I could Lexi, if I was made of money. And plus it's a sh*tload of work building a boat and I still have to work over at the website to put food in your ungrateful little mouths.

Jaden: Well I'm gonna build my own boat and take Mommy and Lexi and Bubba and my real Daddy too.

Terri: Oh Jaden...

Darryl: Don't make me laugh Jaden. You can't even finish that video game your momma spent all of her tip money to get you for your birthday. You expect us to believe that you gonna finish a boat. (Laughing) Hell you and your boat'd sink faster than a fat lady tied to an engine block.

Jaden: I will build a boat! And it'll be bigger and better than your stupid boat. You'll see.

Terri: Jaden! Don't you talk to mama's boyfriend like that. I'm sorry Darryl. I knew I should've left him with his step daddy. The apple don't fall too far from the tree.

Darryl: You got that right baby. Jaden you just got yourself a demerit. And that puts you square in last place boy. You better nut up and shut up if you want on my ark boy.

Lexi: Mr. Darryl, can I bring Tabatha with me?

Darryl: Hell no we ain't bringing no dolls on my boat. Besides, you ain't gonna have time for playing make believe when the sh*t hits the fan baby.

Jaden: I hate you!

Darryl: Good, then the feeling is mutual. Oh, and that's another demerit. Keep it up and you'll be swimming with the heathens.

Terri: Jaden, apologize to Darryl right now or I'm calling your step daddy to come get you.

Jaden: I'm sorry.

Darryl: I'll bet you are - I'll bet you're real sorry-like. Alright, are we done here? I need to get your momma into the bedsack before I get too tired.

Terri: Darryl you are a naughty naughty boy.

Darryl: Baby, you ain't seen nothing yet. I borrowed my sister's credit card and ordered us a whole mess a' goodies off one of them online sex stores. You in for the best 2 month anniversary you ever did have.

The WMTDS censors won't allow us to post the rest of the transcript oh here due to sexually explicit materials.

Rent 2012's today and start beginning to get ready for the end of the worlds. Thumb's up!

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